What kind of writer am I?

I wrestle with this topic in my own way, at some point, almost every day.

There is this quest as a philosopher. It is to truly understand and give a proper account of the world, without bias and misinformation. Lose all assumptions and open your mind to really get a fair look at the world, and not just with your eyes. Using your mind to make sense of it all, and then help others along the way.

But you see, there are many different types of philosophers, and this only describes one sort. So I see that we are all different in many ways, yet we are all the same in many others. How we respect and honor one another, it seems so easy and obvious. How do even the highest of moral beings make quick and irrational mistakes?

I want to be an informed and helpful writer. So I analyze every topic I would write about and rule out the prospect, the ideas I have, simply because I feel the inadequacy of properly labeling the “voice” I may have. There are styles, I don’t know what they are all called and I chose to learn more about science, than grammar. I may not be great at math, but I can spell flawlessly. (Most misspelled words you will read of mine, are because I need to trim my fingernails and my fingers keep slipping off the keys, lol right!) It seems as though writing is reserved for those who study English or History. Purpose and passion is where I come in. But where is the value? Maybe inspirational messages for tea companies…

There are these things about writing, the permanence of your word. Yet, the ability to edit and truly have what you really mean, out there, for the world to see. I love the editing process, but I only do quick edits for my own writing… I have to remind myself, the message is important but I need to always read with fresh eyes before publishing.

There are timelines, and timeliness, not the same. Well recorded events and current events, often with the most pressing messages necessary. But accuracy is the key- “How Urgency Can Provoke Misinformation”, a topic I will write about one day, as it is commonly accepted and sometimes correction is less obvious, so you end up with people with the wrong understanding. What happens when they quickly respond according to inaccurate information? We have a responsibility to be accurate. So dig a little deeper when researching something, especially something important.

I have to keep my writing brief and to the point. It’s all I have time for. As a person with a responsibility to my family, there are many tugs on my time. So I have to stop ruling out my ideas, and make time for the important ones.


Independence and Independents

What do ideas like liberty, independence, and freedom mean in the context of our current world? We can make our own choices, but there are certainly limits to what is deemed allowable (laws) and acceptable (norms)- although not always the same things allowed are accepted and vice versa. One very important freedom in the U.S. for example, we can vote. Our independence to vote for a candidate to represent us is confined by who we can “select” within a “two-party” system, which is ironically being tugged by voices outside of either paradigm to sway the political process this 2016 cycle. The independent faction has responded to this tide by an uprising of candidate’s who aren’t even members of the republican nor democratic party, but must run on the party line ticket to even be eligible for nomination.

Is this the best independent’s of this great nation can do? What if there was open primaries and there was no (R) or (D) or (I) next to any names? You would have to <gasp> vote for an actual candidate based on their platform! It’s kind of exciting and new-agey, but would it work?

It has been the norm since my adulthood that there is a polarity in politics. A right and a left, conservative and liberal positions. Either side seeks to own a voice on various issues, each one opposing the other out of necessity for preservation of it’s own validation as a paradigm. Often these issues are considered ethical or moral stances- abortion is a hot one for example. There’s no squishy room in the middle for people who look at each issue on it’s own, and who also don’t assume that being for one thing means your remaining values are automatically prescribed to oppose another based on political party affiliation.

On the liberal ideology we have a large turnout of the working class, or proletariat, an often (though definitely not always) higher-educated middle to lower income group of people who see the massive gap in their political representation and their paycheck. They are taking the country by storm, banding together after the financial crisis of 2008 tore a hole in their savings and future retirement prospects. Housing was largely lost or given up, and the consensus is frustrated. Student loans are a necessary evil for many to escape the likely impoverished community they are otherwise prescribed to, with interest rates higher than auto loans it might make better short-term financial sense to take up a delivery driver job instead of seeking a college degree for their future career training. The very important issue for this group- How does the government take interest in aiding the large financial interest of institutions before taking interest in the actual people who are the real pillars of our government? These are not only alert citizens but also the dominant contributors to the wheel of capitalism, even though seldom directly benefiting from their loyal contribution. Perpetual serfdom.

On the conservative ideology we have two different strategies to pull in a voter base- a prominent religious undertone, and often educationally suppressed group of people. Since there is no understanding of the manipulation on either side, issues that directly affect the lives of this group are of particular interest- like veterans benefits for example since enlistment is a guaranteed income for very low-income young people looking for any way out. There is always of course the wealthy supporters of this group as well. The issues become freedom from government, mostly taxation and regulation of business prospects. This group identifies themselves as those who are financing the governments ambitions to maintain a status quo for all, and they are pissed about it. People need to pull themselves up by the bootstraps and figure out how to make their own lives better, without the big government wiping their fannies. This mentality is often from entrepreneurs who struggled to get where they are, but presume others can make the same sacrifices they did and anyone else can do it too. Unless of course you are one of those illegal immigrants, then you better learn to climb great big walls. Success isn’t deserved, it is earned. These are the people who look at the business world and seek to create jobs, even if they are not ideal paying jobs- since the risk of opening the business ought to be rewarded at a higher rate than the reward for merely being employed by the business. Lords who inevitably support our troops, since our troops “protect” their investments. Also, guns. Lots and lots of guns.

Representative government is what we are supposed to have, but is that what is really happening? And if so, representative of who? A group of “united citizens”? See what I did there…

Of course this will light a fire under some of your arses, don’t get upset if I didn’t address your particular position in life, or your viewpoint. If you feel unfairly lumped in a group, that’s the problem we are all facing. Disenfranchised voters- that’s what we are called. It’s a real phenomenon. I can’t tell you how many times a devoted democrat assumed I was one of those enemy republicans because I strive to work for  myself and have ambition to do better than I was given, I must be greedy. Or on the other side, a republican who assumed I was one of those pansy liberals who wants everyone else to pay for my way since I am not angry about immigration and I will proudly declare that ‘humans are humans’. One viewpoint is assuming the other is the opposite on all things and must then be declared an enemy. So there is a very large group of us, right here in the middle of it all, with viewpoints that seems to be invalid because they aren’t entirely one-sided. We are independents with less independence than any other voter.

How is this freedom?

We are limited by popular acceptance to voting for one of two parties. You have to either mostly agree with one “party” or you can vote against the one who disgusts you the most by propping up their strongest opponent with your vote- see what I did there… If you take the liberty you are allowed to vote for anyone else, there aren’t enough people in your “party” for it to matter. Go ahead and try, see… you “wasted” your vote.

To clarify, we need to discuss why there are necessary limits to our freedoms. It’s pretty easy really, to protect us from impeding on one another’s freedoms. Life, liberty and property- wait not that- pursuit of happiness. There, now that’s better. It’s always better when it’s edited properly to portray the actual political interest. Because if we had a right to property, well, then it couldn’t be taken from us by the powers that be unless we lost it square in a card game. More on that another time.

This didn’t clarify why our voting freedom is limited to an antiquated polarized system. In order to preserve our freedoms, we must exercise them. If we want to remain independents with independence, we must exercise our interest in freedom and take the liberty to vote accordingly. Now if we could just settle on the right candidate together.


Rainy Day Blues

It is one of those rainy days here, as I am sure it is in many other parts of the world. When you look outside and see cloudy skies, wet weather, and it is a little chilly, how does it affect your day?

Creativity is sparked in some.

Others enjoy a warm cup to drink and a quiet book.

Many curl up and hide… really.

I like to do stuff. I drive to places I keep meaning to go, and check them out. I hit my to-do list, and actually accomplish some of the items (like write on my blog.. hey hey double whammy… keep on reading and you will see what I mean!)

Refreshing as it is, getting things in your life and home ready for the winter takes extra effort. The enticement is certainly not the actions necessary, even though the completed projects are rewarding.

Today~ I repotted a sad plant. It was on clearance for $3 from a nearby home improvement store. I was worried about this plant. It wasn’t doing horribly, but didn’t look happy enough for an aesthetically motivated house plant buyer to want. I thought to myself, “I sure don’t have any dying house plants right now, maybe I should get one.”

The fate of this very pretty green and yellow leaved plant was not advancing well into the future, unless I did something about it. Whining kids in tow, I searched the soil for bugs, none seemed evident. None of the leaves have been chewed on or spotted, only yellowing and only from the center of clusters, making me think it was either over or under watered, and was outgrowing its current conditions.  I checked the roots, and sure enough, bound in a twist, thick, and suffocating.

So I did what any ordinary garden/plant geek would do, I bought it. The whole way home I thought about two things- it would be great if my 3 year old stopped kicking the seats, I’m trying to freakin drive; and my track record with house plants is terrible, why did I just get one that needed extra help? Balancing this questionable line of reasoning, I sucked it up to the facts- at a mere $3 it would be a great next victim.

This struggling plant sat on my porch for a day or two, just in case those bugs showed up, didn’t want a population to fester without consent. It did eventually come inside and sit on a shelf, with just enough light (according to the little tag). That was 3 weeks ago… Took a little longer to make room in the schedule I guess. It got threatened with being banished to the porch by my other half, if I didn’t repot the silly thing already.

Today I actually did it. I made a crock pot recipe (red beans and rice) for dinner, and after cleaning the kitchen from breakfast and the prep… I looked out side and said to the audience, “I’m finally ready to repot this plant, come on 3 year old, lets get our hands dirty!”

It took a whopping 10 minutes.

Once we repotted it, I did what every ordinary person does, I looked up the plant variety. Wait… I think I did it backward-  turns out it’s going to be OK. Apparently, it’s not toxic for dogs and kids so that’s a relief… that was my first investigation. If they eat the stem of the leaves it offers a significant burning sensation in their mouth, but other than that it is safe. Knowing that I decided to keep it above reach, don’t want the new puppy munching on the green stuff in between meals and getting funky, ya know what I mean?

So on this rainy and wet day I helped Mother Earth with similar efforts;  I helped something struggling to stay alive flourish and grow. My cup is full.

What can you do to make Mother Earth smile on a rainy day?

The only down side, I don’t think the plant and pot match very well… Like my mother would advise, use what you got. Hopefully, it will outgrow the pot and I can do this again sometime!

Spring has (not quite) arrived!

Browsing my own (few and far between) writings here, I notice how the seasons affect my perspective. I love all of them, and now I can laugh at myself for being so serious about it all. Of course, it’s spring for me so cheery and thriving, growing new things, bright and colorful. 

Love the cool weather, with the sun peeking out and keeping it warm enough to play all afternoon. Kids love it too! Energies are rising, and my eldest just arose so off I go!

“A Girl Like Me”

The sweet song of a 2 year old, as we brisk through the grocery store during the noon hour. As one woman visually scolds her competition walking past her in line- she smiles at the song, and then at me.
Open minded people are the cushion to breathe between one another. We make room for all with politeness and understanding. There’s no judgment.
If we assume the standard is the same for all- we could be causing tremendous pain for those actions we don’t accept. Our rejection is societies ail, and ale. It makes us ill.
So smile- and try your hardest to understand.

What I think about birth centres: an interview

Although this article doesn’t consider American birth centers, maybe we should have more?



Laura Iannuzzi is an Italian midwife, currently studying for a PhD at Nottingham University in England.  After qualifying as a midwife in 2001 Laura has worked in different areas of practice, and since 2004 Laura has been employed by the University Hospital of Careggi, latterly at the Margherita Birth Centre.  Laura’s research topic for her study is ‘An exploration of midwives’ approaches to slow progress of labour in English and Italian birth centres‘.

Laura emailed me and asked if she could interview me about my thoughts on birth centres-not for her study, but because she is interested in the relative success of birth centres in England. I agreed of course, as I usually interview others!

Dear Sheena, first of all thank you very much for your availability for this interview. As you know, this is for me a great pleasure and honour; you are indeed largely recognised as an inspirational…

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Disgust, horror, and Western Buddhism

Interesting notions, and insightful commentary follows.


Let us turn now, O sisters and brothers, to the Satipatthana Sutta, I:1:6:

If a monk sees a corpse dead one, two, or three days—swollen, blue and festering—he should think: “My own body is of the same nature; such it will become, and will not escape it.”

His mindfulness is established, and he lives detached, and clings to nothing in the world.

And if a monk sees a corpse thrown in the charnel ground, being eaten by crows, hawks, vultures, dogs, jackals or by different kinds of worms—

Or a body reduced to a skeleton, with some flesh and blood attached to it, held together by the tendons—

Or a skeleton, blood-besmeared and without flesh—

Or reduced to disconnected bones, scattered in all directions—here a hand bone, there a foot bone, a shin bone, a thigh bone; the pelvis, spine and skull—

He should apply this perception to his…

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Please Help Me Correctly Direct My Hostility About This Jeffco AP U.S. History Kerfuffle

A little Q and can request for A from a good friend near JeffCo.


You guys. I think I need some help here on deciding who I should be pissed off at during this whole bangarang. Or maybe I just need to understand what I am missing so that I can more accurately judge the people around me who are all up in arms about this.

In trying to wrap my head around what the crux is of the argument on the APUSH (Advanced Placement US History) curriculum change that is prompting all the sick-outs and walk –outs in Jefferson County. I know it’s silly and antiquated, but as usual, I’ve gone and done some research before forming an opinion. And I am befuddled.

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The seasonal downpour comes early this year

Usually around November, when the skies become grey on a regular basis, and the flourish of summer becomes dormant, my eyes well up and my mood darkens alongside my surroundings. I grow quiet and calm to match.

I’m sure a Dr. would label this as “seasonal depression” or some similar “problem”. Recommending exercise and a healthy balanced diet (which I do both anyway), and this little magic blue pill that makes it all go away.

That little magic blue pill isn’t the answer, doc. Why is it not ok to be sad sometimes? Fear of irrational behavior? Let’s just make the world perfect and happy, science will fix it all! After my only sister, my only older sibling, overdosed on magic pills that were supposed to “fix” her- I choose to remain magic pill free.

The sadness this year comes early on account of a reality check. So instead of doing anything irrational, I ration my life. I say to my family, ” you get this and she gets that, he gets this every so often, and I will continue to cook, clean, and care for everyone.” But I am also doing this and this for me. I don’t tell them the last part, I just do it. If there is an issue they will be gently reminded that I am also a human and need to care for myself, or there will be nothing human about me left once they have all taken what they want.

And so I ration. I ration how often I speak and what I say. I have no excitement left, for that takes more than I can muster and it’s better to not fake it- children notice everything. I ration my chores and make sure needs are met, the extras I often provide must wait until spring.

This is the only thing I can do, because it is a form of suffering. Balance is required to overcome the feeling of malcontent. I must enforce boundaries for my own sake.

Sometimes you just know, ya know?

After a stressful evening surrounding the notification of a minor financial setback (letter from the IRS- ahem), I was informed of something rather hurtful- albeit true.
Something I knew but kept trying to convince myself wasn’t really true, because it would be easier for everyone if it wasn’t.

But it is true and that sucks.

There are things in this world we can change and we can control, and then there are things we cannot. We cannot change who we are, but we can control ourselves. We cannot change others, but we can influence them. Sometimes it doesn’t matter because the reality of the situation is what it is.
I overheard someone once say they hate when people use the expression, “it is what it is.” This didn’t sit well with me because it is acknowledgement and acceptance of reality, whether you like it or not.

So today, instead of my usual optimism and productive offerings I sit quietly and reflect on my situation. The best thing I can do is take time to make the right choices, because after all, my choices affect everyone else in my life.